MPC Press International

Food in the Bathroom

admin — Fri, 11 May 2012 00:55:09 +0000

No one eats in the bathroom. There is a general ban on food in the can. But what about this scenario? You have just picked up your sandwich at the deli, it’s in a paper bag, and you stop in the bathroom on the way back to your desk. First, do you leave it on the counter next to the sink, risking someone’s water splash, or even theft? Or do you hold it while going number one, which is not necessarily easy, and could lead to spray (on the bag)? And do you bring it into the stall if you need to stay awhile, placing it next to you on the floor, which may not be clean? Of course, the bathroom air does not pollute your bag lunch and the bag is there for protection. But the idea of bringing food into the bathroom doesn’t sit well with people (one becomes a target of ridicule), and there is clearly some risk to the food. So, it seems to make sense first to walk back to your desk, drop off your food, and then head to Fonzie’s office.

Middle C vs. Middle Seat

admin — Sun, 01 Apr 2012 04:30:32 +0000

Middle C is mostly good. The Middle Seat is all bad. Middle C is squeezed between highs and lows. The Middle Seat is squeezed, and it is mostly lows, while you are high. Middle C is pleasant and relaxing; you can’t complain. The Middle Seat is unpleasant; you can’t relax and it generally doesn’t help to complain. Middle C is next to B and D. Middle Seat is rated F. Middle C is better than Middle Seat, see?

Focus

admin — Fri, 17 Feb 2012 22:38:52 +0000

Once upon a time, there was a boy who just couldn’t focus. When he spoke, he would switch from one subject to the next without finishing a sentence, when he did his homework, he would read half of a page of history and then move to another subject, and when he was on a call with a buddy, he would surf the internet (this latter problem was not actually due to an inability to focus but simply an attempt to multi-task). Before I finish the story, I want to remind readers that it is a 3-day weekend and you should leave work early to avoid traffic. So, the boy who couldn’t focus became confused, mixing up his Great Gatsby with Great Expectations, and his parents’ own expectations of him became less than great. On an unrelated note, if you are heading out of town, I did notice that certain roads may be closed due to weather. Eventually, the boy overcame his problem by sitting in a room without a computer or related device and with only one book at a time. He was forced to focus on one story, one book, one subject. Will finish this later.

Multi Trashing

admin — Thu, 09 Feb 2012 21:48:55 +0000

Here’s what I just saw: A woman in her mid-twenties, seemingly coming from or heading toward a workout. Of course, she was sporting lululemon from top to bottom, giving away her clearly healthy intentions. Now the irony. 1) She was carrying one of those extra large Starbucks coffees. (I won’t support the Starbucks language regarding cup sizes, as their “tall” is the smallest; I call it a “small” when ordering.) Ok, fine, coffee is justified, assuming it was after the workout; 2) She was smoking a cigarette. No further comment. 3) She came this close to being hit by a car while she jaywalked across a busy street–not surprising as I noticed her headphones and head looking down at her iPod. Multi-tasking? To say the least. I would call it multi-trashing.

Tech Love and Death

admin — Fri, 13 Jan 2012 22:52:00 +0000

Once upon a time Jack received an email addressed to him and many others including his old friend Jill and until this point he had no idea where she was or how to reach her during the past 10 years so he clicked “Reply to All” and then deleted every other email address but Jill’s and said hello and asked if she’d like to grab a cup of coffee so they did and exchanged cell numbers and she texted him “TY Good 2 C U” and he replied “Dinner nxt wk?” and they dated and on her birthday he bought her an iPad and on his birthday she bought him a Kindle Fire and the relationship became serious and they skyped all of the time when she traveled for work and texted and emailed and skyped so much that they grew sick of each other and broke up.

Peep Show

admin — Fri, 02 Dec 2011 21:06:37 +0000

I watched half a movie on the flight yesterday. It’s not what you are thinking. I didn’t see only the first hour or the last hour. It was two hours and I watched for the full two hours. But my seat had an obstructed view, with the overhead blocking half of the screen. I believe it was “Captain America”, but I saw it as “America”. It took place in War II…probably World War II. There was a beautiful woman in the movie that had at least one breast. And the star, the America guy, kissed someone. I think it was the beautiful woman, but actually the beautiful woman wasn’t too happy later, so he probably kissed someone else. The movie wasn’t half bad…or half good. That’s all, I gotta “split”.

Don’t Park Near a Strip Club

admin — Fri, 11 Nov 2011 20:07:21 +0000

Yes, this is a family website, but I’ll be tame. It should be a basic rule: never park your car near a store, club, etc. where you would not want to be seen. Yesterday, as I walked to my car (in the lot across from “Love Jungle”, where really, I was not visiting), a friend happened to drive by. Sadly for me, he honked, smiled, and gave me a thumbs up. Of course, I could call him and offer full denial, but this would probably make the situation worse. The only way to prevent this type of scenario is to observe the surrounding area when you park.

Finding an Illustrator

admin — Sun, 06 Nov 2011 05:46:22 +0000

I can’t draw; my pigs look like dogs. In every guide to getting a children’s book published (here is one), it is stated that publishers prefer that children’s book authors submit their work without pictures. The publishers want the job of pairing the authors with illustrators. I sent my first children’s book, Lawrence the Laughing Cookie Jar, to publishers back in about 2002, and I didn’t include illustrations. I wish I could offer the publishers’ views on the pros and cons of submittals with and without illustrations but most of the 30 publishers never responded and those that did, simply said, “we are not interested in your book, but thank you.” However, it does seem that the major publishers (you can go to their websites) prefer to introduce children’s book authors to their own illustrators, typically artists with whom they have previously worked. Anyway, knowing that my book would not be published, I looked in the mirror and suddenly found an expensive but quality publisher–Marks Publishing Company, now known as MPC Press International. Yes, I am talking about yours truly, the only publisher who could not say no to me. MPC Press simply smiled back in the mirror, knowing it would receive a healthy fee.

So my search for an illustrator began. And, MPC kindly offered to find me an illustrator! Not only had I been hired by a publisher, but this publisher was going to pay for my illustrator. For the next step, MPC (I, the author/publisher) went to the websites of two local art schools, The San Francisco Art Institute, and The Academy of Art College and posted help wanted ads. Within a couple of days, I had received emails from a dozen students and alumni who were ready to illustrate Lawrence the Laughing Cookie Jar. At this point, few of these people had websites displaying their portfolios so I met each one for coffee. (For my second children’s book, Rhyme, I was able to review the prospective illustrators’ work online.) As for my meetings, it was easy to say a quick “no thanks” to George and his morbid collection of skeleton drawings; these just weren’t right for this particular children’s book. And Laura’s graphic nudes didn’t make the cut. But Josephine Taylor’s work was more pleasant and appropriate and she became the illustrator of my first children’s book. Feel free to contact me for information on cost.

Socks in the Clouds

admin — Tue, 18 Oct 2011 23:59:13 +0000

Question. If you are sitting comfortably on a plane, in your stocking feet, and need to use the lavatory at 30,000 feet, must you put on your shoes? For one, it can be uncomfortable fitting your expanded feet into your shoes at this high elevation midway through your flight. More important, does it matter if you stand on an unsanitary floor in socks that will be thrown in the hamper upon your return home? Of course those socks will first touch the inside of your shoes (which may be smelly and dirty already, but not from what is covering a public bathroom floor). I don’t seem to care but are there any informal rules here? Thoughts?

Hello

admin — Fri, 30 Sep 2011 20:40:02 +0000

Do you talk to the person next to you? We all think about saying more than “hello” to the airplane passenger in the adjacent seat. Some of us have a firm view, one way or the other, and those that do generally believe in keeping quiet. A minority consider it fair game and a way of life to at least ask, “are you heading home or away?” And an overwhelming majority, talkers or not, do not want to be seated next to the John Candy character from Planes, Trains and Automobiles. It takes a lot of work to keep up conversation in a polite way with this type of neighbor. All of us have been confronted, and everyone has tried the sleep route, shutting our eyes (rude perhaps, but not so rude during takeoff) at the first lull in the conversation. With a chatty cab driver, it is easy to fake an incoming phone call, and at some point cell phone calls will probably be status quo on planes. Recently, I sat next to Henry Winkler on a plane, and he couldn’t have been nicer. I would bet that everyone speaks to him on flights. In fact, an obnoxious passenger behind me, upon overhearing me ask about Happy Days, said, “I guess we just can’t leave Fonzie alone.” Or maybe I was the obnoxious one for making small talk. I took a five hour flight this week, and as we were landing said my first words (other than “excuse me”, when climbing over to go the lavatory) to the adjacent passenger. After 5 minutes, we discovered that we were childhood friends who just didn’t recognize each other. Going forward, I may be more chatty, after this pleasant occurrence.